You Have No Idea How Much I Remember.

I remember riding my “big girl bike” for the first time. I crashed into the rose bushes and cut my legs. I remember turning around to see my aunt running towards me, trying to cover up her laughter to save me from more embarrassment.

I remember going to see The Nutcracker with my dad every Christmas season. We would go on a daddy/daughter date. Spaghetti Factory then the ballet. I remember how much I loved it. I remember the first year we didn’t go. I remember I asked why. I remember asking if we could go this year. And the next year. Never getting a direct yes. I remember how happy and young I felt when I was showed the 2 tickets for December 22^nd 2012.

I remember going to my first midnight premiere. And going to more and more after that.

I remember my first all-nighter.

I Remember.

I remember going to San Diego with my dad in the 5^th grade. I remember he took me there because I was obsessed with dolphins so he took me to sea world and I got to swim with the dolphins. I remember my dad would do anything for me.

I remember breaking my foot and feeling so embarrassed going through school on crutches and having to use the elevator in the scary 9^th grade hall.

I remember only wanting to be with you.

I remember being scared. I remember being nervous. I remember looking back and missing those days. I remember loving where I’m at right now though.

You have no idea how much I remember.

I remember how lucky I am everyday.

I remember how this all just fits.

I remember losing almost everything.

I remember.

I remember mY mistakes. My feelings. My emOtions. My regrets. My ThoUghts.

I remember everything I am never going to be able to forget.

{E.V.E.R}

I remember when I was close to death. I remember not giving up. I remember wanting to.

I remember how you always know what to say. I remember that feeling I got when you told me you couldn’t live without me. That you would never leave me. That you need me. That you love me. And you always will. How happy I make you. How I saved you. How you don’t know where you’d be without me. That I’m perfect. And when you tell me I am the best girl ever.  And how beautiful I am. And amazing. When you say I am the best thing that has ever happened to you. When you say I have no idea.

You have no idea how much I remember.

I remember closing my eyes and only wanting needing you.

I remember having bad days and only wanting you here with me. I remember you helping me so much.  I remember how you'll never realize how much you mean to me. I remember how selfless you are. 

I will always remember you.

I remember scaring others. I remember being scared myself.

I remember losing everything.

I remember moving on.

I remember trying to hold myself together. I remember trying not to fall apart.